Self Talk
Cut or tear out the Attribute cards. Working individually, sort the cards into four categories:
Record the attributes that are “exactly like me” and “a bit like me” in the table below. |
Reflect on and discuss briefly how the way we describe ourselves may influence self-esteem.
A Day in the Life of Katie
Katie was going to be late. She had to help her younger brother and sister get ready for school today because her Dad had to go to work early and her Mum was working night shifts. And Matt and Jodie were being little pains. She couldn’t find her clothes for volleyball training and then she burnt the toast and spilt the orange juice.
In the end, Katie had to run for the bus and tripped over on the way. Katie looked around quickly to see if anyone had seen, thinking how clumsy and stupid she must look.
At school, Katie got her mark for the History exam — 72%. It was a good mark for Katie; last exam she got 65%. But she had studied long and hard for this one and she thought she might get closer to 80%. The teacher had said it was well set out and well written but some of the dates were wrong and some more detail would have been better. Katie knew she could write a good essay (she got good marks for English) but she struggled to remember all the historical facts and dates. Katie wondered why she couldn’t remember this stuff even when she studied hard. She thought she must be dumb.
In Maths, they had to work in pairs and Katie was paired with Tony. Tony was really struggling with the work. Katie certainly wasn’t brilliant at maths but if she worked at it she found she usually got it in the end. They didn’t get all their problems finished but Tony said that Katie had helped him understand a bit more and Katie found that trying to explain it to Tony made it a bit clearer for herself.
In Home Economics that afternoon, Katie’s scones turned into hard, dark brown lumps. Everyone in the class was making fun of them. Katie was embarrassed but she laughed with the others when they joked about playing cricket with them. The teacher said the thermostat must have broken in the oven but Katie still thought she must have done something wrong.
At volleyball training after school, Katie missed a couple of serves and spiked a couple of balls out. She really stuffed up one of the serves — it didn’t even make the net. The others laughed. Even though she made a couple of winning shots later, she still felt bad about the mistakes. The coach said she was going well and improving but Katie thought he was just trying to make her feel better. She sighed — she just wanted this day to be over.
Katie was going to be late. She had to help her younger brother and sister get ready for school today because her Dad had to go to work early and her Mum was working night shifts. And Matt and Jodie were being little pains. She couldn’t find her clothes for volleyball training and then she burnt the toast and spilt the orange juice.
In the end, Katie had to run for the bus and tripped over on the way. Katie looked around quickly to see if anyone had seen, thinking how clumsy and stupid she must look.
At school, Katie got her mark for the History exam — 72%. It was a good mark for Katie; last exam she got 65%. But she had studied long and hard for this one and she thought she might get closer to 80%. The teacher had said it was well set out and well written but some of the dates were wrong and some more detail would have been better. Katie knew she could write a good essay (she got good marks for English) but she struggled to remember all the historical facts and dates. Katie wondered why she couldn’t remember this stuff even when she studied hard. She thought she must be dumb.
In Maths, they had to work in pairs and Katie was paired with Tony. Tony was really struggling with the work. Katie certainly wasn’t brilliant at maths but if she worked at it she found she usually got it in the end. They didn’t get all their problems finished but Tony said that Katie had helped him understand a bit more and Katie found that trying to explain it to Tony made it a bit clearer for herself.
In Home Economics that afternoon, Katie’s scones turned into hard, dark brown lumps. Everyone in the class was making fun of them. Katie was embarrassed but she laughed with the others when they joked about playing cricket with them. The teacher said the thermostat must have broken in the oven but Katie still thought she must have done something wrong.
At volleyball training after school, Katie missed a couple of serves and spiked a couple of balls out. She really stuffed up one of the serves — it didn’t even make the net. The others laughed. Even though she made a couple of winning shots later, she still felt bad about the mistakes. The coach said she was going well and improving but Katie thought he was just trying to make her feel better. She sighed — she just wanted this day to be over.
- Discuss some of the unhelpful things that Katie might be saying to herself.
- Write Katie’s self-talk in the thought bubbles below.
- From the story, list the Katie’s positive characteristics.
- Thinking about Katie’s positive qualities, what more helpful self-talk could Katie use to cope with her bad day?
- Can you think of any times recently when you have used unhelpful or negative self talk? What did you say to yourself?
- Can you think of any alternative, more helpful things you could have said to yourself?